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My baby loves me, with my classic ride.  She's scootchin’ right up side me, on that one piece front seat.  A solid body—made from real steel—it’s got a sturdy feel; not like those plastic cars.  They’re so cheap.

CHORUS: Old school cruisin’, cruisin’, cruisin’, cruisin’

Feels like I’m driving in a work of art; each and every part joins together like a Pevsner.  The curves, the ornaments, the tail fins... Their sense of style back then was groovy, big and bold and care free.

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Come climb aboard my rolling time machine and you’ll see what I mean.  It’s real a blast from the past.  And be transported to those happy days, with all their simple ways—like an engine you could work on.

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Things weren’t perfect in the world back then, though they have never been.  It was a different era.  I get nostalgic, looking in that mirror.  What’s behind is nearer to my heart, in some ways.

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Out and about, can’t help but cause a scene—like a tractor beam—drawing attention and it’s all good   ...brings out the best, it seems, in everyone.  ...having some good clean fun; making new friends wherever we go.

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I think I'll get a set of white wall tires; maybe those fuzzy dice and some visors for the headlights.  This car deserves a little TLC.  It’s been so good to me ...guess you could say we’re in love.

Old school, old school, old school, old school cruisin'.   ...cruising on the street of dreams.  We had the sweetest dreams, Old School Cruisin'.

We are fashion freaks; yeah, a for-real phenomenon …got it going on.  And when they see us come, people get out of the way.  'Cause we’re looking like celebrities, with red carpet underneath our feet.  We in the Three Mile Zone.  Look out, here come the paparazzi!

CHORUS:  All the heads turn... look at me; look at you.  'Cause we cool, we so cool.

Yeah we cool, we so cool.  (Repeat all)

We from another world.  Oh yeah, we look like aliens.  'Cause what we got on, nobody seen before.  And they don't know what to think.  What they wearing... is it Givenchy, Prada, Versace or Armani?  Little do they know …got it from the thrift store.  Oh yeah!

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You see ‘em lick their chops, because we look incredible; almost edible.  So we got bodyguards, 24 hours a day.  It’s not easy, being popular.  Cameras flashing make the vision blur.  That’s why we wearin’ shades (and it’s hard to recognize us).

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Over in Paris France, or with our peers in Tokyo, we go toe-to-toe.  In London, New York, Rome

—you see us strut’n our stuff.  On that runway like a slinky cat …show our audiences where it’s at.  Hope they don’t get a crick, rubbernecking like an owl.  "Hoo, hoo, hoo!"

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I’ve got more neurons in me than stars in our galaxy; neural pathways than astral bodies in the universe.  Still it comes as a surprise—the thoughts that orbit inside this little cranium that’s generating all of them.

CHORUS:  I can pull it... pull it out of my hat.  I can pull it...

Some situations require someone who’s somewhat inspired.  Let me give it a crack.  I’m putting on my thinking cap.  Closing my eyes, I can see solutions staring at me.  It ain't no hocus pocus.  All I do is focus.

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I try to keep my hat clean, like a well-oiled machine.  My mind is in it, so I limit my exposure to dirt.   I store my magic in there.  It don’t come out of thin air.  What’s in my bag tricks?  Only what I fill it with.

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When my ideas don’t fly, I give it another try.  Test every theory by the scientific method.  And when I get in a jam—just can’t come up with a plan—I say a little prayer and heaven always puts one there.

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TMZ asked me, if I see stars, to let ‘em know it.  It happens all the time.  Their path will cross with mine.  And more than just a privilege, I feel a solemn obligation to share these magic moments with the world.

CHORUS:  Stop the presses; hold the phone.  Look who’s in the studio zone.  Stop the presses; hold the phone.  Get them juicy details and make ‘em known.

Minding my own business, as I shopped in Franklin Village, imagine my surprise (she's got the biggest eyes) ...Amanda Seyfried, in my checkout line, with what appeared to be a meat thermometer.

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Had a brush with royalty, on Runyon Canyon trail.  I walked right by the Bieb.  He even looked at me.  And it seemed that he was wearing those new shoes from Salomon. But I couldn't say for certain. It was dark.

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Sunday, at the Grove, I'm pitching pennies in the fountain, (my way of passing time, 'til someone happens by) when just across the street a starlet leaves the Farmers market... Emma Stone, with artichokes in hand.

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Dropped in for a meal at the old Musso and Frank. And sitting next to me… George and Amal Clooney.  So I wait until they leave and brush the crumbs from their table, which are sure to fetch a fortune on Ebay. 

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Refrain: Oh sure, they printed more in days gone by.  But journalistic excellence will never die. 

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You meant the world to me.  I guess that shows how much I cared for the world.  (Repeat)

You don’t wanna know what I have in store.  You don't wanna know.  (Repeat)

So I...

CHORUS:  Keep it on the down low.  Keep it on the down low.  Keep it on the down low... the down low, down low.

I ain't gonna say what I hid away.  I ain't gonna say.  (Repeat)

I’m gonna…

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Ignorance is bliss. I can tell you this: Ignorance is bliss.  And what’s in that abyss, you ain't gonna miss.  Ignorance is bliss.  So I…

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How you gonna feel, when it’s all revealed?  How you gonna feel? When the mask is off and you know what’s real, how you gonna feel?  I better… 

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As I open up my mind... wanna be connected.  Traveling through space and time... wanna be connected.  Operating my machine... wanna be connected.  With my fingers on the screen... wanna be connected to the Living Vine.

To perfect power source.... wanna be connected.  That I may remain on course... wanna be connected.  Through. a portal that is pure... wanna be connected.  And a server that is secure... wanna be connected to the Living Vine.

Navigating through the stars... wanna be connected.  Reaching out to worlds afar... wanna be connected.  Sifting through the silicon... wanna be connected.  'Til at last my work is done... wanna be connected to the Living Vine.

What’s the matter baby?  You say it’s not your day.  Well, that’s okay.  I got something right here

That’ll lift your spirits, guaranteed.  'Cause I know that you’re online and that we’ve got good connection.  Now if you’ll accept my cookies, we can get on with this business.

CHORUS;  If you think you’ve seen it all before, click this link and find out what’s in store.  If you think you’ve heard it all before, click this link and find out what’s in store.

When this woman got out bed, it seemed a day like any other.  Little did she know, what lay ahead would change her life forever.  All of a sudden, the doorbell rang.  But she hadn't gotten dressed yet.  What happened next, you won't believe.  I'm rolling on the floor with laughter. 

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Here’s nine things most people don’t know about Princess Leia.  Ooh la la.  And when you get to number seven, it may just blow your mind.  I broke it down into bite size pieces, so you could savor every detail.  In between the ads, you’ll find the story in there somewhere.

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Everyone loves a story.  Well, I might just have one here.  Only bear with me through a dozen pages and I’ll deliver on that headline.  We’re building up to a climax.  You’ve come this far—don’t give up now.  In the end it’ll be worth it, I swear.  These pennies ad up quickly.

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Ha, made you look.  Made you look, yeah.  Your the fish that's biting my hook.  So who’s your friend? Now guess again.  We’re living in a world of pretend.  And I made you look.  Made you look, yeah.  Your the fish that's biting my hook.  So who’s your friend? Now guess again.  We’re living in a world of pretend.

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Welcome to my store.  What can I do you for?

Have you heard about us yet?  Well, we're the fastest growing service of this kind.

After carefully considering your answers, we determined that this unit is exactly what you're needing, at the moment.  So here it is.  So here it is.

CHORUS:  Place your order right now and we'll throw in one of these...

We have all your favorite colors and it comes in several sizes: one for you and your companion, 'cause you each are gonna want one.  But wait, there's more.  Yes, there's more.

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There may be others on the market, but they can't compare to this one.  With our patented expansion slot, you'll find no end of uses for it.  The possibilities are endless.  Oh, they're endless.

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It slices and it dices and it matches with your curtains.  Did I mention, there's a discount if you call before this song is over?  So pick up the phone.  Operators are waiting.

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My father was dashing; my mother a dish.  And when they came together, the world got it’s wish.  Born with those features that make one sought after, yet deep down inside, I’m like everyone else.

CHORUS:  Don’t hate me ‘cause I’m beautiful. ...Can’t help it if your life is dull.  The world don’t need another troll.  Don’t hate me ‘cause I’m beautiful.

Some have great talent—they’re really quite clever—while others are graced with a strong disposition.  And then there are those who have no special virtue, but look like an angel has fallen to earth.  

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It’s true that some things do come easier to me, like dinner engagements and job interviews.  But there is a down-side to these invitations.  Reject their advances and all bets are off.

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They say that cosmetics can "make up" the difference. But for green-eyed monsters, there is no disguise.  What makes someone ugly is what’s on the inside.  If you must despise me, take issue with that.

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I'm gonna my happy dance. 

—happy dance (repeated)

I wanna live forever. (Repeat)

What you doing to me?  Darling, can't you see?  I can't move without you, on the dance floor.  Oh, my Cinderella girl, no one in the world can fit into your glass high-heals.

CHORUS:  What I'm goin' do?  Ain't no one call fill your shoes, girl.  What I'm goin' do?  Ain't no one call fill your shoes.

My kingdom's incomplete.  Yeah, there's an empty seat next to mine, with your name on it.  If you make your own, girl, I will share my throne.  What's a prince without a princess?

...said you had to leave by midnight.  That beauty sleep is working, girl.  You're doing something right.  But the party barely started.  Why'd you have to show up, just to leave me broken hearted?

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Girl, you've got to know: everywhere I go, something there reminds me of you.  Life's just not the same.  Everything is lame, since you're not here to rock it with me.

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